#2 Road to ICSI - Bersediakah aku?

1. Persediaan Kesihatan

Esok, hari untuk Dr. Natasha re-access my condition.
She'll be worried if my number of follicles is not helping me.

Setiap hari, I've tried not to show DH on how I felt inside.
How scared I am if there's only 2 or 3 follicles inside me.
The most I had was 5 follicles during my IUI last year and that is with the help of Clomid.

Berat badan pon sekarang ni dah byk turun since my last IUI.
I lost 14kgs in total and now tinggal lagi 8kg nak kena kurangkan for the right BMI.

I've started to follow Dr. Tasha advise to take supplements like Asid Folic, Fish Oil, Co10 and Multivitamins.

So let's hope for the best in me!

2. Persediaan Mental

I am now 50-50.
Sometimes, I'm being positive but at times, I do afraid if it fails.
Whether I could accept the heart breaks.

Roller coaster of emotions.

But, DH has always been supportive.
Walaupon selalu kena hadap my mood swing.
Dia relax and cool je.
Even skang ni I tau sesgt yg dia pening kepala since the "BELOVED" government buat system minyak floating ni.
Itu pon belum tambah dgn problem staff dia yg hari2 dgn mcm2 kerenah.
I mmg tak kan amik tau pesal hal station dgn dia.
He still will do his best to take care of my feelings.
Walaupon kdg2 sakit hati jugak bila I je yg kena cari info for the fertility treatment ni and dia ley relax main game, but at the end DH ni mmg jenis YES je.
Dia ikut je apa I decide.
I think most of the guys mmg macam ni kan perangai dia.
Still rasa grateful jugak sbb dia nak jgk lah ikut kan and he will of course accompany me to every single appointment with the doctors.

Not forgetting the support that I get from my closest friends and my TTCians friends.
I read all the TTCians blogs yg dah pernah buat IVF/ICSI.
Some succeed in their 1st attempt. Some not.
So semua tuh buat I rasa confident with the decision to try the procedure.

To add to it, now I selalu dengar kat youtube / mp3 all the surah-surah dan doa utk mendapatkan zuriat instead of listening to my favorite songs.
I felt more calm of doing so.

Last week kan our 6th anniversary, since we already been doing readings on IVF/ICSI before I start with the treatment, we've both decided tema hadiah anniversary kali ni is US.
Meaning, kena beli hadiah utk 2-2 boleh guna.

Dis is what I gave him.

Dis is what he gave me.

Beli ni dgn harapan nanti kalau 2ww I tak ler sangap baring saje.
But main game sebenarnya dgn DH sebenarnya lagi stress.
So we shall see how nanti ya.

3. Persediaan Kewangan

Alhamdulillah, for the past few years after I got back from Jakarta, rezeki memang tak putus2 for both of us.
Masa buat decision to come back and work in KL, hati tu terasa jugak whether I could live as it is sbb duit oversea allowance dah tak de kan.
Sebelum ni masa dok kat Jakarta, I tak bawak pon my salary nye bank card ke sana.
DH simpankan. Online banking pon I deactivated.
Survived mmg dgn duit allowance je.

So just imagine bila balik keja kat sini, I lost like half of my income.
Tapi itulah, the more I spent on the fertility treatment, the more I get back.

Besides that, jangan kedekut dgn ur parents!
In my case, I have a mom only.

Tiap2 minggu bawak dia pegi makan kat tempat dia terasa nak makan.
If dia nak baju, I belikan dia baju or apa saja lah..
Kadang2 terdetik jugak "Bulan ni nye saving berkuranglah nmpknya" tp Alhamdulillah tak berlaku.
Mesti I akan dpt je side income dari memana and selalunya lebih dr apa yg I spent kat my mom.

Pastu bersedekah lah.
Give to those who in need.
RM 1 pon tak pe.
In my case, kalau g lepak kedai mamak tu, kalau tetiba org dtg mintak sedekah, mmg I tak bagi.
I tak percaya semua tu sbb byk case kan semua tu sindiket and they have physical ability utk buat kerja lain.
Kadang2 I siap suruh DH offer kerja kat station dia kalau dia tak buta lah.
What I do, time bukak FB tu, kalau ternampak org2 yg share post minta bantuan utk kos rawatan apa2 especially utk babies and toddlers, I will do online transfer direct.
Better that way. If kena tipu pon, itu between dia dgn Allah.
In Shaa Allah Tuhan akan give back to us the money that we spent berganda2.

So kalau untuk kos rawatan IVF/ICSI ni , In Shaa Allah we both are prepared.

4. Persediaan Cuti

Another great news, my CEO has approved my leave whenever I need it for the treatment.
But of course with condition.
Dia punya condition is simple, make sure I can be contacted at any time.

So memang bawak laptop ke mana saja la jawabnya lepas ni.


So what else?

1st Appt with Dr. Natasha Ain

Ok semlm pegi ke Hospital Pusrawi for the 1st appointment dgn Dr. Tasha.
Instead of taking half day EL, I got half day MC sebab batuk teruk and tonsil bengkak.
So sampai kt Pusrawi mmg awal sejam dr scheduled 230pm.

Buat registration then dpt no.
1st patient.
Tp nurse dah bgtau awal2 yg dr maybe lambat sbb ada case.
So waited till 345pm baru dpt jumpa dr Tasha ni.

Oh em gee!
She is beautiful as well!
And soft too.
Lebih kurang sama macam Dr Adilah tp Dr Adilah cam tegas sikit and Dr. Tasha ni lebih lembut lagi bila bercakap.

So start la explain and showed her our previous report.
Her direct conclusion,

Her reason, we've tried IUI before and it has been 6 years and we are both 35 this year.
Why wait?

Somemore, DH got problem as well.
To make it even worse, when she did the TVS scan, my fibroid is still there but alhamdulillah the size has been reduced from 5 cm (last IUI) and now 2.5cm.
And the position of the fibroid pon tak mengganggu ovary.
Also another problem of mine is, the number of follicles.
Semalam dpt tgk 1 je on left side, yg belah kanan tak nampak apa pun.

If I have problems with my number of follicles, makin panjang la citer TTC iols nampaknya.
She prescribed me with supplements to increase the follicles number.
Next appointment will be next Saturday.

What she told me to consume :

1. Multivitamins
2. Fish oil any brand
3. Coenzyme Q10 any brand.
4. Asid folic

IVF cost under Dr Tasha is around RM 14-15K.

Now, am I ready to go for IVF this cycle?

Keliru.

Yes lately byk fikir.

Tak tau bila nak start treatment balik.
Kejap igt March, but when the time comes, time tu la sibuk dgn business Maq & Rock iols.

Susah betul lah!

Then 1 hal lagi, rasa macam nak proceed with IVF terus pon  ada jgk ni instead of trying out IUI for the 2nd time.
Sbb terasa macam malas nak buat masa ke sana ke sini lagi.
So nak terus hadap je.
But DH pulak macam nak slow and steady.

Anyway, hari ni CD2.
Pagi tadi called Dr Adilah and at the same time bukak website Hospital Pusrawi.
Nurse baru Dr Adilah, Salina takde plak.
Yg pick up call kata nnt dia sampai kan pesan.

Then masa browse website Pusrawi tu, I came across these ads :

Menarik kan?

Secepat kilat Iols call.

And I managed to secure an appointment at 230 pm tomorrow!

Dapat lak Dr. Natasha Ain.

Sapa Dr. Natasha ? 

Sila gugel.

As long as dpt Dr perempuan, I am good to go.

Walaupon nak kena start semua all over again.

And bernasib baik jugak buat appointment terus tadi sbb Salina return my call and told me Dr Adilah besok ada case at 3 pm. 

Pagi appointment penuh.

So it's a sign for me to start dgn Dr yg baru kot? 

We'll see how.

Dr. Natasha ni same clinic dgn Dr. Prashant at KL Fertility Centre besides Pusrawi. 

Dekat Pusrawi, Dr. Natasha ni just ada ari Isnin and Rabu.

Speaking of Dr. Prashant, my 2nd boss, is his IVF patient. 

And my 2nd boss tu baru je dpt baby like, yesterday! 

His 3rd IVF but 1st with Dr. Prashant and terus success after 7 years menunggu.

My 2nd boss tu pon ari tu ada bagi I kad Dr. Prashant tu tp Iols masih berkira2 nak pegi sbb Dr. laki kan.. 

Esok ni pon Iols amik half day EL je. 

Yang ni Iols dah pk masak2, boss mana yg marah Iols pesal dok amik coti semedang ni mmg akan dihamput balik la jawabnya. 

And normally yang selalu bising I dok coti ni ialah my CFO while I am reporting directly to my CEO.

CEO Iols ok je as long as I still reply his emails and the work is done anywhere and anytime he needs.

So besok, Iols berdoa sesgt everything will be good. 

If Dr. suruh Iols proceed dgn IVF pon Iols will terima dgn redha.

Anyway, our 6th anniversary is coming this 3rd April. 

So far tak de pon pk nak celebrate dekat mana since ari tu dah ada advanced anniversary trip ke Abu Dhabi - Dubai.

But ada pressie lah dr Iols kat DH.

Dr DH ke iols belum tau apa dia lagi.

Iols mintak handbag tapi macam biasa takkan la dapatnya... 

So kita tgk nanti apakah dia.