Crash, boom, bang!

Macamana tajuk post, macam tu lah hati saya waktu received the blood test results.
Need I elaborate more?

It's BFN!

Sedih?
Yes. But kali ini lebih kuat.
I cried for only few minutes in the car.

Bila dipujuk oleh DH, I managed to set myself calm.
We had our discussion.
DH wants us to give a break before proceed with the 2nd IUI.
So this cycle break jap and continue March.

DH wanted us to improve on our weaknesses the other day.
Me to reduce the fibroid size and DH to improve his sperm counts.

Kendian DH pancing pulak to go for retail therapy.











And we bought this!

After dekat 10 tahun tak tukar katil.
Dr zaman sebelum kawin.
Time kawin pon beli katil baru utk letak rumah my in laws je.

So who knows can, dgn aura katil baru, we manage to conceive naturally lagi ke..
In Shaa Allah.

Semlm masuk kerja pon saya kuat.
And later in the evening ada spotting.

AF is on its way.

Today, AF muncul.

Bohong kalau ai cakap ai tak sedey..
But I have prepared myself, kalau tak jadi this time, I will redha and will keep on trying.
I have to be positive at all time.
I tak nak stress as stress pon boleh membantu fibroid utk membesar dgn jayanya.

Besides berdoa, ai do alot of readings.
Read psl rakan2 TTCians yg dah berjaya mendapatkan zuriat.
What they do, what they eat.. semua lah.
Mana yg i mampu, i ikut.

At least I know when it turns out BFN, i know that I have gave my best shot in trying rather then not trying at all.

Till then..

Thanks to my TTCians friends and friends in Whatsapp, IG, blog, FB yg telah mendoakan saya.
Saya pon berdoa agar semua yg senasib dgn saya dibagi peluang utk mendapatkan zuriat mereka jugak..

In shaa Allah...


BHCG test = RM 91.

11dpIUI

Lagi 4 hari akan buat blood test.

Let me story kat u ols apa jadi hari IUI tu.
This is going to be a very long entry.

On 12th Feb 2014, my IUI is scheduled at 1030 am.
Hubs need to ejaculate by 830 am.
Arrived PHKL at 815 am, rushed to BLock C the IVF lab to give the sperm.

Settle urusan tu dlm kol 845 am.

Went off for breakfast.

By 930 am, I cannot pee already sbb 1030 am kena make sure I am fully bladder.

Today tak ramai sgt patient pon.

Sbb ramai Dr. Cina yg dah start cuti CNY.

So 1030 am, my name is called to see the Dr.

Bismillah....

First of all, Dr told us that his count was not so good but still can proceed with IUI since she had experienced with lower count than his succeeded before. 

Although a bit down, am still glad it can still be proceed.

So Dr told me to lie down on the bed and bend the knees.

Relax, she said.

So she put out all the necessary utensils with the help of her assistant, Ida.

Then slowly and gently she put the speculum into my V.

This is how the speculum looks like.

At first she puts in the smaller size but unfortunately my uterus cant be open with that size. 

The fibroid is pushing so it is not opening.

Amik ko.

Dr. said that she need to changed the speculum to a larger size.

Rasakan.

Waited for about 5 minutes jugak lah sbb Ida nak kena cari that speculum.

So continue again.

This time Alhamdulillah, terbukak uterus tu selepas Dr cubit sket.

Terjerit jap I masa ni sbb sakit.

Penderitaan I tak habis di situ.

Lepas speculum dah lepas, Dr need to insert the catheter lak.

This is how the catheter looks like.

Memula Dr masukkan yg 1st one tu. The rubber one.

Tak ley masuk.

Then tukar to 2nd one, slightly tough rubber.

Tak ley jugak masuk.

Then changed to the 3rd catheter, a tougher rubber.

Gagal jugak.

Masuk no 4, pon sama!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Then she said, I'm going to insert the STAGE 4 catheter.

If failed, we can't proceed.

The final catheter is the one made from STEEL.

Ya besi!!!!!!!!!

But besi lembut lah.

Dgn lafaz Bismillah...

It works!!!!

Berjaya dimasukkan terus ke my uterus.

Then she quickly bukak the USG machine and asked me to hold and tgk masa dia masukkan sperm tu directly to my uterus. 

I was about to tears masa ni.

If you are not sure how the process is, here is the video.

Lepas settle semua tu, Dr. suruh I baring for about 10 minutes.

Then dia started to brief me on the medication.

I was asked to bed rest till 6dp IUI.

Kurangkan berjalan kata dia.

She prescribed me with Duphaston and Utragestan to be taken till 15dpIUI.

And she scheduled me for a blood test this 14th Feb.

Ya Allah, permudahkanlah semua sepertimana Engkau permudahkan perjalanan sebelum ini...

Total bills for Ovidrel + IUI + Duphaston + Utrogestan + Consultation = RM 2004.30.

Cost may be variance to others specially in my case, a large speculum and 5 types of catheter has been used.

Skang debaran terasa. 

Went to work today after 12 days on leave. 

Eggs checking CD 11

Nurse Ida baru called.
Kena tukar appointment date instead of this Thursday ke besok!

And I'm super scared now.

Semoga Allah permudahkan segalanya lagi kali ini...

Update check up CD3 with Dr. Adilah.

Arrived at 840 am and amik no dulu.
Igtkan dah awal, tapi tetaplah dapat no 10.

Amik ko.

Turun bawah lepak Starbucks dulu la jwbnya.
Layan caramel hot choc dulu.

Me mmg addicted with Starbux Caramel Hot Choc. 

So mmg bawak tumbler siap2. 

DH pon layan minum yg sama jgk tp lagi tamak sbb amik size Venti terus.

Dalam kol 1015 am mcm tuh baru dpt jumpa dr.
Nak lagi best?

They can't find my file.
Chantek!

Kena citer balik kat dr apa jadi.
Dr. Chantek suruh buat TVS.

Gosh.

Here comes the bad news.


I have 2 Subserosal Fibroids.
1 is diagnosed on my right side. Closed to my ovary.
Size 5 X 9 cm.
And it had been pushing my right ovary until it cant be seen thru USG.

The other one is diagnosed at 2 cm size and at almost the same position with the right one.


On the other hand, dr. Chantek said that my uterus is fine.
So she prescribed me 100 mg Clomid.
To be taken for 5 days (again).

Next appointment will be next Thursday (CD12)

If on that day, my eggs are there with the right size, will proceed with IUI.

Ya Allah, permudahkanlah semuanya....


Total bill today with TVS, Clomid and Consultation : RM 316.

CD 2 - Appointment set with Dr. Chantek.

Called Ida, nurse Dr Chantek.
Appointment is set tomorrow.

Ya Allah, permudahkanlah perjalanan ku yang satu ini di tahun baru ini...

Will keep posting on the journey soon.